Quiet and common notions...shared here...with you! Of life ~ our hearts and our home.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Being Steadfast - Part two!

As mentioned in my post from this past Thursday that there would be a follow-up post on being steadfast... what did I really have in mind, when I posted that? Well, here are a few of my "honest" thoughts on this subject. AHHHHH!

Being steadfast in and during trial is one thing, according to the book of James. And then there is being steadfast in and through Mothering (I'll get to this in a minute). Our church is currently going through a series on the book of James.... and "right out of the chute", it's been hitting home for me. As in questions like; Does my life exemplify Joy in Trials? Do I see the fruit of perseverance (or steadfastness) in my life?

I don't know. It really gave Scott and I something to talk about these past few days/weeks. We can really understand times of trial and times of blessing. Everybody's story looks different. What may be or feel like a trial to one, is nowhere the level of trial to another. And that's what our life currently looks like now.
In moving to this "new for us" home (farmhouse apartment) just last weekend, we are now so overwhelmed with all the blessing that we are currently enjoying. But two and a half years ago it was not the case. Rather, it was a trial that we entered and then had to endure. While there was still provision and blessing on a regular basis during that time...it was still something to be desired. We waited through it. And God was gracious. I suppose that was living out the part of "being steadfast".

I mentioned to someone recently about feeling like I have "survivors guilt" because there are so many others, who right now, are going through some really tough seasons in there life and here I am enjoying such a HUGE blessing. How can that be fair? Yet, as I mentioned before, I do realize that not everybody goes through life at the same pace.

Our Pastor made mention that "if your not currently going through a season of trial then start preparing for one, because one is coming". There is a lot of truth in that. One of the things I am personally grateful for is the consistency of my husbands attention to detail. Financial trial is a big one, for so many people. And honestly, but humbly, I thank God for giving Scott a firm foot down on our lifestyle and desire to get rid of (and stay out of) any and all debt. That right there has been tough (a trial?)- when the temptation was and still is to "keep up with the Jones'" and to spend, spend, spend.

A lot of folks are really going through tough financial trial (for various reasons) right now. But, I want to say this, being debt-free has not always been the case for us. And Scott would be the first to say he has made some really stupid (poor) decisions over the years and has had to learn life the hard way. So have I. Literally four years ago when we married we were "quite a lot in debt" and with lots of hard work and God's help, we were able to get out from under that, all while I was planning to be a stay-at-home Mom. This was a conviction of ours and one we felt strongly that God would have us do... for me to stay home with the little ones. Looking back -with the current economic situation (as we know it to be today)- we can not thank God enough for His grace in this area of our lives.

Almost four years later, I remain a SAHM. I will be honest some days I don't like it very much. IT IS HARD WORK and much, much more (work) then I ever imagined. It isn't all that I imagined. It's lonely, thankless, and exhausting. It's daily grind interferes with my "wanna-be,-so-called" agenda. AHHHH!! There are many days when Scott will get home from work and he can tell I've been in tears. Oh how badly I want out of the equation, just get me off this "merry-go-round", somebody stop the train!! Some days I really feel like I cannot do it anymore.

And then there are sermons, cards from family, and hugs and prayers from my hubby... and I know that ONE DAY... one day is coming when I will reap the reward (the crown of life) if I remain steadfast in and through this trial. This sometimes trial of Mothering is just that, only sometimes if I really do think about it. There are many, many rewards as well. Many moments that are JOY and well worth being a Mom!!

  • I love that I am the one that is home and raising them and not somebody else...
  • I love being able to comfort, satisfy and kiss away the booboo's...
  • I love that I can see fruit from the consistency of discipline and teaching... some days more then others
  • I love that I feel needed...
  • I love being the wife to one awesome man and the Mother of his children...

I just hope and pray that I will continue to be steadfast -in being the best wife and Mom that I can possibly be!!

By the way, I had a really great Mother's Day!! I didn't have to cook...and we went shopping!!!

: : Does anybody else relate to this? I know if your all honest, you have your days of Motherhood trials as well, how do you handle them? And what has helped you through?



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