Quiet and common notions...shared here...with you! Of life ~ our hearts and our home.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

With regret...

Forget that this is the second, of the month of June, in which my hubby usually will add his thoughts in post form for what is called, "Scott's Second Sayings".   With regret... he ran out of time,  with too much going on last evening. 

Anyway.

More importantly. 

It is with MUCH regret that I was unable to attend the funeral service for 7 month old, Owen S., yesterday.  I had a Dr. Appointment scheduled at the exact same time frame, for Caleb, so I couldn't go.

From what I've gleaned - I missed a very heart-wrenching, yet truly beautiful service.  I was there in my heart-of-hearts.  I'm very sorry I wasn't there personally.

Please read this link for yourself... from my friend Christy, who attended the service.  After reading this post, I felt as though I had been there, for myself. 


Did you read it?  You must... so as to get the gist of the rest of this post, here today.


So were you in tears, too

As soon as I finished up reading - trying to control my audible crying (sobbing more like it)- my son, Caleb, overheard me and comes over to me, asking; "What's the matter, Mommy? It's okay, Mommy."  He's three.  AND that by far is becoming one of the sweetest things to me... yet during the course of my day, yesterday, though a very GOOD day overall, I failed.  I was so impatient, and getting more and more so with both of my little ones throughout the afternoon.

I gave Caleb a big hug and squeezed extra hard (as he asks us to when we give each other hugs - squeeze hard, he says).  I told him how much I love him, and asked his forgiveness.  He hopped down and ran off... to play.  Only to challenge me with more of the same from earlier in the day.  ((sigh))


I think the Lord in his graciousness is trying to teach me something (as He is always is, right?)  Here is why I say that. 


Earlier, in the morning, I was reading this post, by my friend Monica from over at the Homespun Heart.  And felt rather convicted by it, as well.  Trying, throughout the day, to implement {it's} challenge to be more of a "Yes mom", rather then always (quickly) saying NO! to everything.

I can say, with regret, I'm not very flexible.  Which is totally why I need to remind myself, regularly, this little saying.

"She who is flexible,
will not get bent out of shape."

I forget that all of the time.

As I was lying down to sleep, for the night.  I was prompted to pick up this book, called "The Christian Mom's Answer Book".  I thumbed it open (page 298, to be exact) and my eyes fell on these words of the Apostle Paul where he says this..."For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all". (2 Corinthians 4:17)

Basically Paul is saying that minor problems (or irritants,and or nuisance's) actually have some sort of greater purpose - an eternal reward.

I kept reading...

Challenged to see the goodness of God and his Grace, on me, from the irritants or wearisome-ness of the day.

Then I finished out the chapter by reading this short story, which in reality COMPLETELY encapsulated the whole of the day....including all of the links that I shared with you to read.

I'm going to paraphrase it, to just to keep it simple.

**  Two moms were at a playground, each with their sons.  They didn't know each other and got into typical small talk.
After a short while the one mother calls out to her son that it's time to go.  In which he calls back..."Can I just have five more minutes?"  "Sure", his mother replies, "five more minutes".

This goes on for several more rounds.  Each time when the mother called that the five minutes were up and it was time to go... the boy would call out and ask for five more.  Each time she said "Yes!  Sure, we can stay."

The other mother feeling somewhat confused, simply states "Wow!, you are a patient mom".

To which the first mother replies.  "There was a day when I wasn't so patient.  You see, my older son, was killed by a drunk driver while riding his bike not too far from here.  I would give anything to spend five more minutes with Tommy.  Todd (my five year old) thinks that he is getting five more minutes to swing, but the truth is I just get five more minutes to watch him play."  **


((gulp))


I don't want to live my life with regret.  I'm grateful that God is wrestling my heart - every day- to keep his attention.  I humbly ask, any who care to, to please keep me in your thoughts and prayers.  As a mom woman- this is probably the hardest thing (to date) I've ever had to go through.  To...keep my responses and reactions in balance.  To... love on my kids, more and more... by letting the irritants, and nuisances slide more and more. 

Our days are all numbered, for each and everyone of us...let's choose to live regret-free.

5 comments:

  1. Wow....

    A really good friend that loves you must have given you that book :)

    HUGS,
    Mitzi

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  2. Beautiful words. What a blessed reminder to treasure our children. I am a spoilsport with my kids too and am often impatient. Thank you for posting, it was much needed today.

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  3. Thank you for sharing your heart. Your words have touched mine today.

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  4. Missed Scott's writing but I am really glad to read this post. You put into words what we all feel at times, powerful.
    Yes, regret is very unforgiving.

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  5. Thank you for this timely reminder Bevy! I think all of us "moms" struggle with this from time to time, especially when our "to do" lists are long and we don't willingly make the time for our precious kids. The Lord has really been working on me on this area recently. Thanks again for sharing your heart and being so open to express the sentiments I am sure many of us feel. Laura Suermann

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