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Not long ago - I had a dear friend say some pretty hard and intense words that really hurt me. Though not truly directed right at me, nor intended for me - they came - because of me and I so badly wanted to own them and harbor her angst, making it mine. Allowing that to drive a wedge.
Does anyone relate to this?
I don't see this friend as regularly as I'd like to! And honestly, I was glad there for awhile that I didn't have to face her, too soon. Because, it would have been - too soon.
Honestly. I had to really process my response. I had to decide to forgive this dear, dear friend.
She's right - in her mind. She is completely right... and there is absolutely no changing her.
This could go round and round.
My wanting so badly to have her see and hear just how very wrong she is...
Because she is.
See why I say this could go round and round??
However. Here is where humility, grace, love and kindness go a long, long way.
And, it's hard!!
I love this dear friend to death.
When I did see her recently... I was a wreck (down deep). Oh!! We had a pleasant enough time and visit - but it truly revealed (in my heart of hearts) just how much I have yet to forgive...
Truth is. I'm not perfect. And, I have been forgiven much. That said, I must extend forgiveness as an ongoing and outgoing - from my soul...to others whether they ask for it or not.
My prayer is that I will simply show my friend all these things (of love, humility, grace and kindness) that will one day soften her heart completely...
And, if it's mine that needs to be softened, just as much, then let it be.
I pray for the both of us in this regard.
“Forgiveness is an act of the will, and the will can function regardless of the temperature of the heart.” ― Corrie ten Boom